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Friday, December 03, 2004
Why? Most days, I forget DJ has Asperger's. I don't know if it's because I've just dealt with it for so long. Maybe it's because it's just the two of us. Or it could be because I just love him so much that I will myself to ignore the little inconsistencies and the uniqueness. Some days it's just so hard. Today is one of those days. I can't make it better. I can't make it go away. I can't overlook it. I can't pretend it doesn't exist. It's one of those days I feel helpless. I'm his mother, why can't I help him???? It started with a spider. A simple spider combined with bloodcurdling screams, over and over and over. He wouldn't stop screaming. The spider didn't touch him. I killed the spider. The screams continued. Non-stop. Why? He couldn't stop screaming long enough to tell me why he was screaming. Screaming combined with him running through out home with stinkies hanging out of his butt. Then the screams turned to whimpers and I hushed all his fears away. Then started up again in full force when I tried to maneuver him in the shower to clean his butt. I couldn't take it anymore. He had to go in his room. Then he just continuously screamed about that. I'm unfair. I'm evil. I'm mean. Now he is sleeping peacefully, looking like the sweetest cuddliest little boy you'd ever imagine. I'm left upset and drained. Searching the internet for more news. more interventions. I'm starting to second guess myself. Did I do the right thing? Did I miss an all important step? Sometimes, being a mommy really sucks. by lilhoneypa at 07:40 pm
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all about me Wendy Full time mommy Full time student Warning! Leads extremely boring life Photo Album Cast Page 100 Things About Me Come with us as DJ takes us all on an Asperger Adventure! daily reads 6767 Adventures in Autism The Aspie Diaries The Aspie Life Autism Diva Bloggg California Hammonds Domestic Pschology dooce Go Fug Yourself Hidden Laughter Is This The One? Left Brain Right Brain Mom With Attitude Mommy Guilt Moody Mama My Son Has Autism The Narcissist's Secrets Our Aspergers Teenage Boy Our Journey to Rescue Alec Penisnews Ponderethereal A La Aspie Pre Rain Man Autism specialneedsmom.com Sometimes Holland Feels Like Hell Stories of My Family Talking.to.Sweetface This Mom Tiny Voices In My Head daily links AutismLink Autism Key Autism-PDD Resources Network Autism Society of America Autism Today Center for the Study of Autism Child Find ED Law Feingold Program Floortime Future Horizons Getting The Truth Out OASIS The Out of Synch Child The Source US Autism & Asperger Association daily archives August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005 April 2005 March 2005 February 2005 January 2005 December 2004 November 2004 October 2004 September 2004 August 2004 July 2004 June 2004 May 2004 Copyright © lil bit O'honey productions daily inspiration Ten Things Every Child With Autism Wishes You Knew God Sent Me An Angel Patron Saint Welcome To Holland Heaven's Special Child A Special Little Boy daily details You are visitor number: Thanks for stopping by!  Above image created by Dawn Stealing is encouraged! daily rings and things |
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